No Scratch

SYNOPSIS: A furious, deranged, subversive, synth-punk-post-funk rock-n-roll comedy, depicting one day in the lives of a troupe of benighted would-be Barrymores sometime during the Ferocious Depression of the 2020s. Play is a companion piece to DIRTY UGLY PEOPLE & THEIR STUPID MEANINGLESS LIVES, which was done last summer at Moving Arts/L.A. Theatre Center.

Ticket prices: $18 regular, $16 students (with valid id/senior citizens. $25 opening night including refreshments and "meet and greet" with cast and crew.

Opening Night: September 21, 2002	Final Performance: October 27, 2002
Producers: Fran Bascom & Atsuko Ohtani Bailey	Co-Producers: Lissa & James Reynolds
Writer/Director: Frederick Bailey	e-mail: fct@fremontcentretheatre.com
Theatre: Fremont Centre Theatre 1000 Fremont Ave. South Pasadena, CA 91030 626.441.5977	Tickets: 1000 Fremont Avenue South Pasadena, CA 91030 (626) 441-5977 (626) 441-5976, fax

BOX OFFICE OPENS 2 hours prior to scheduled performance times.
Telephone confirmations for all reservations left on Voice Mail are made regularly EXCEPT on day of performance when notification will be made only if the show is SOLD OUT and your call is received 2 hours prior to performance.

Fremont Centre Theatre has a 24 hr. Voice Mail Registration Number. (626) 441-5977

BREAKDOWN OF CHARACTERS: Please NOTE: all parts non-ethnic specific casting

ARTHUR (ARCHIE), 35: a slicker in natty attire, pencil moustache and bow tie; wears a shabby tux in the second act; he’s not as smart as he’d like to think.

TED (NICK), 35: a burly, crafty guy in jeans and vest.

JODIE (MAXIE), 25: a cheap, aggressive actress; the punk look: wears hotpinks vinyl miniskirt, bright red spike heels, thin shirt with chains hanging from the shoulders, wild haircut.

SKINNER (ANGIE), 30: a strong arm with a short fuse; wears sweat pants and sweat shirt at first.

RUSTY (THE STUMP), 30: an intense twerp in a ridiculously silly costume.

DARLENE (CUTIE-PIE), 20: a mousy auditionee, afraid of everything, in torn tights and thick ankle socks, tennis shoes, skirt, ponytail.

SKY SKRAPPER, 25: a very young, incipient baglady with high hopes; dressed in rags (the layered look), carries several colorful bags and satchels.

COP, 30: pseudo-friendly, mean, lovesick, vengeful; wears a white motorcycle helmet, black shirt with arms cut off at the shoulder, black baggy pants, combat boots, armband, a chainmail vest with thick leather belt; carries a sawed-off shotgun.

BEER SALESMAN, 30: a schizoid urban guerilla; baggy pants, copious hunting jacket with lots of pockets, World War I helmet, hair tied in a knot at the crown.

GLORIA, 35: a high-class dame, dressed in white silk or satin, carries a small black reticule and a small fur.

WALLACE, 30: an artlessly aggressive salesman, wears a flashy, ugly polyester suit, too large for him, pantscuffs rolled up, aviator cap; looks like a goon.

MAYBE, 35: a disenfranchised society type, sarcastic, aloof at first, but then her reserve dissolves; wears a white, two-piece suit, high heels, gaping runs in her stockings, fur, hat slightly askew, pale make-up, red lips.

MOOCH, 30: an aimless, shiftless rowdy, greasy hair, black trousers, ragged high-school jacket, sneakers.

ORANGE MAN, 30: a bug-eyed, glue-sniffing bum in torn pants and nasty sports jacket, probably retrieved from a rubbish heap; no shirt; wears a paper sack on his head.

MAN WITH A DATE, 35: an obscure military type, helmet, mirrored sunglasses, crisp shirt and trousers. His Date is a home-made dummy: skirt, blouse, necklace, cat-face painted on the head, which is made out of an empty plastic milk carton.

NOTE: ORANGE MAN and MAN WITH A DATE will be played by the same actor.